hi big world

So, here it is 5am and I can't sleep. I have some minor insomnia issues from time to time and guess this week is one of them! I had a fab week and so I am not sleepless over anything stressful thank goodness.

However I do find my mind working overtime due to planning for fun trips ahead and running past adventures in my mind. Looking forward to a trip to So Cal next month as my bestie DK will be out from the wilds of Montana for a few days.

I went south to see my sweet friend AKS last week. We had some great talks as we settled her into her new house. It is funny how you can be friends with someone for years and still learn new things about them. We got to talking about sex & relationships...maybe as she is just ending a long term one and thus this sort of thing was on our minds. Plus I am sure that bottle of champers we had helped the convo along too! I am about as single as a girl can be so it is interesting to talk to someone who spent the last 2 decades in a relationship while I was out in the crazy dating world.

The thing that amazed me is how we both have such low views of ourselves in the way of romantic relationships. I know I am an amazing friend, as I am blessed with amazing friends.

 ( I SO love my girls who will be mentioned quite a lot within this blog in entries to come!)

To be honest though when it comes to man/woman relationships I kind of suck.

I have been in love 2 times, once as a teen and once in my 20's. Both were great guys in their own way, but in the end just not great for me. I have had my handful of bf's in the past 20+ years of dating. but I still feel like I am missing something.

I am waiting for that relationship where I can truly be myself & the fab man I end up with loves that about me...all my flaws & quirks would be acceptable to him.

Of course I would have to take all of his quirks & flaws also...that kind of goes without saying, right?

I wish we could see ourselves as others do. I think my girl AKS is gorgeous inside & out. She has the biggest, most generous spirit of almost anyone I have ever met...plus she is pretty. Sadly she doesn't feel it as she didn't get that sort of recognition from her partner. We all need to feel we are beautiful. We all need to have someone tell us we are...

 beautiful

sexy

loved

appreciated

So, I am making it my new goal to tell those in my life exactly that.

Even bigger than that I am going to try and believe it of myself!

Wish me luck and take a moment to compliment someone you love today!